Addicted to Love

In empty parking lots at dusk many people hide out in their cars, waiting for deliverance. Anxious for another fix. The location changes day to day, but even the hassle of it isn't much of a deterrent. All across town, vacant pavement becomes a lucrative hideout for hushed transactions. Where you might be known by a fictitious alias- or perhaps a pen name- like the former Mayor of WVC. When you want something you know you probably shouldn't have, you figure out how to make it happen. You make excuses, you sneak away, you ask around, and always know exactly how much it will cost you.

I resisted for a long time. I knew that a lot of people shared this hard-to-break habit, but certainly not to this extent. Many days I try to ignore what I crave or where to get it. Often I convince myself it is not something I need. Just a want. And on occasion, I find myself wishing I had never known how mind-blowing this little indulgence would turn out to be.

And then some days I just give in. I hold crinkled bills in my sweaty palm and show up wearing no makeup, ponytail hair and faded sweatpants. I disregard any feelings of shame or guilt or second-thoughts and just live in the moment. Because I can. Because I like it. I crave it. Maybe I even convince myself I somehow earned it. Deserve it. Need to have it. Blah. Blah. Blah.
Justification for gratification. Simple as that.

And sometimes it doesn't feel wrong at all. It feels like a hug. Like the unconditional love you fully appreciate once you know exactly who your real friends are. And that's where I'm at.
It's comforting happiness.
All topped with homemade whipped cream.

So now you know exactly where to find me sometimes.
After dark. In the moonlight. In a random parking lot. Around Salt Lake City. Near a painted hippy truck. Delighting over pure Belgian goodness.

-JB

Disclaimer

Here is the small print. The blog post warning label. Almost everything these days seems to need one. 

So here it is. The official disclaimer.

Between Time & Dreams is a personal blog. Its not journalism. Or an instruction manual. Or a manifesto on how things should be. It is not prescriptive or definitive. 

Its simply me sharing my personal thoughts and opinions. On a wide variety of topics. Some stories you might find entertaining. Some assertions might rattle your mind. You may or may not agree. These are feelings and ideas. And that is perfectly okay. You might find my perspective untypical, especially if you were to somehow try to stereotype me, which I don't recommend.

I might have an opinion that gets you all fired up. Or not. 

Discussion & engaging dialogue is how we all figure this life out. So pull up a chair and share.

I say this so you don't have an expectation that this blog is something that its not. 

Sometimes I use humor that could be potentially offensive to people who might be sensitive. I might blog about random things like boobies and breastfeeding, boogers and toddlers. Sometimes a bad word slips out. If you are easily offended, perhaps this is not the reading that will bring peace & calm to your soul. There are plenty of bloggers out there that are much more polished than I am.

This girl is a work in progress. I'm not perfect. I mess up. I strive to learn and grow in my understanding every single day. I love God, my husband, my kids, my family, my friends, my church- and I want to be the best version of myself that I can be.  I'm passionate and driven to make the most of this life. Not waste opportunities.

My point of view is based on my current real-time understanding. It might change, it might not. Comments, questions, critique, and your stellar insight is always welcome.

As far as my opinions go, sometimes I can be right on the money- 

and other times I miss the mark. I am willing to listen. Let's talk about it.

I am also going to ask the tough questions. Questions you might think about, but not want to say out loud. I'm willing to go there. Because I think there are lots of things we don't question enough. Things that don't have any biblical basis, yet we treat as Gospel. We go with the flow. We uphold the status quo. We do what everyone else is doing. Just because. Perhaps we should seek out wisdom more than we do. Be humbled. And face hard questions. Be willing to examine any blindside we might have when seeking truth. Because truth isn't afraid of being exposed or being wrong. Truth remains.

Next post will be coming at you soon...

~JB

Matthew 7

13 "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many will enter through it. 

14 But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."

Hang Loose

There will be a new post from me up soon...

Open Letter

It takes courage to speak up. Especially when it is something this important. I share many of these same concerns and wish I could have been as loving, eloquent and straightforward addressing them. I hope honest conversations can bring about unity, restoration, and change.

Here is the link:  Tim's An Open Letter To My Church